[...]withdrawal, indifference, dysfunction) but “the actual physical shadow of a state of being that broke the circuit of a *gestural economy of seeing and being seen*”
in the maner of my mother: you don't warm up to stranger, you know who you are talking to, you watch what is going on, you help those in the circle
(Stewart describing how in her town) lamps were strongly favored over overhead lighting, lending texture and specifity to the scenes
a pause at a window --> to check in with the unfolding and pleating of a world pulled in and out through the glass <-- this is not just a practice of looking but a mood*, ruminative or touched, for good or bad
•impulse to venture into a place that pulls watchful bodies out of windows


danger
hassle
inordinate distance


#on getting lost with Janina: “this is an adventure and I am not alone.” (anxious + hervorheben رهسپار شدن)
(with Janina ♥ we experienced) disorientation, displacement, and the experience of getting lost (are foundational sensory modes of living out regionality)
*wondering out: palpably unpredictable and seductive; a specific disorientation
•half-deliberate exercise of getting yourself lost
•direct link between intention and effect
* dragging agency into a منشور prismatic affective structure * [prismatic: flickering, gathered into lines, angles of light or motion to attune to, =/= simply present and knowable]
•lost in a loop
*run: fueld by (performed) anxiety, our trip was peppered with moments of disorientation
-the enactment of disorientation poised on the edge of the accidental
-with Janina somehow we found ourselves in an exercise of orientation/disorientation as it is attaching me to place, childhood, some buttom line humanity (called Ungeschicktheit) that depends on giving up competence*** (and often finding oursevels orienting with that rainbow caterpillar disoriented on your forehand)
---our shared ‘should-have-been-obvious'es with Janina
---Janina's misshapen forces*** --somehow--> reach a plane of expressivity (for me--because i love her?)
---the event, its affective structure, is familiar from childhood and strangely satisfying, like a loop i had to make, *an emotive-agentive place i had to check in with* --?--> Janina + Sina forms of belonging
(sometimes that place is a fully-invested connection and weighted, like home)
***forms of belonging: tactile + full of force + tentative + risky /--{"+” : are, and, yet}
--> an ecology of paths that matter by means of the things that happen in a present in which we are *lost yet attuned*

--> all the ways that people and things venture out into reals [my mother, Sina, Janina, ...]


[*]town: currents of difference, affiliation, history, ordinary dullness and comforts, characters and their stories


psyching out ethnicity


(my old attunement:) the fear of cockroaches

the miracle mile of computer technology

the elitism of the historical societies

localness nests in:
•tastes
•bodies
•neigborhoods
•a valley
•a state
•a geographical region


“in each scene of the production of history there are events that are storied or otherwise pulled into play” (Stewart)

Stewart on salem witch trials
the accusations spiraled through families, catching people up like magnetic strips
“wicked little sorceries” -->{jumpy moments that suddenly lay the charge of a half-known intensity onto ordinary people and roads, regionality becomes a wicked little sorcery. a vortex that pulls possible forms into life into a moment's alignment}, {the adjective ‘wicked’ marking *excess* of all kinds}
astrology
fortune-telling
*an attunement to specters*
-a farmer admitted getting into ‘the snare of the devil’ because he had a large family and ‘the world went hard with him.’


robustness in cold weather


[title]
making of edges and scenes in ajayeb

character or texture of an edge

(ajayeb is made of elements that were) a thing sensed with certainty (yet made up of a shifting, edgy composite)
[a sentient shadow called jinn, God, darkness of a pit, a cycle, etc.]
--or--> made scenic *as a site of a world's potential* (= ajayeb)
--the scene of a thing's demise

an edgy irruptive event

rules and edges are OK when separate, but together, a bad combination

(Karin + Sina + Hanno) we were humans together

--we adjust ourselves to the done deal that things happen--

(we find ourselve being) “from here” in a world made intimate through forgiveness, denial, detachment flowing in after a surge of something bad--a close call [Stewart]


*what are ajayeb's turns (and turn backs) to the inarticulate real?


hallucinogenically down-to-earth (Aela)


what are ajayeb's state of emergent expressivity [today]? (that tries to guess and describe ‘what is happening’) **** things that happen are incitements to form ****
--> intensities become expressive --> an خونسرد impassive corporeality --> intensities pass from body to body --{
•human bodies
•animal bodies
•machine bodies
•bodies of thought
•ecosystems
•visceralities and noumena [a thing in itself, as distinguished from a phenomenon] spread out across a vast atmospheric field

sediments of ajayeb:
•obvious
•much remarked
•cryptic --> favored
•situationally precise

how ajayeb is an improvisatory conceptuality?
does ajayeb-writing takes place in singularity? (because every worlding is singular and precise ==> the pleasure of its recognition)

#my project in apass has been a practice of writing that is an experiment in attuning to ajayeb's tune

ajayeb reports of:
•affect that has become native***, attaching to bodies and socialities, to an ethos***

with ajayeb (with Stewart) i am learning:
•to approach the tactile compositionality of things
•de-dramatization of academic thought
•to approach the thing that throws itself together *slowly and enigmatically*--> #andakhtan, andaze
•a descriptive detour (with Latour)
•a lyrical evocation (with Stewart)
•a method of awkwardly approaching an object by attuning to it as a thing of *promise and contact* (with Berlant)
•

concept: that which attunes itself to things coming into form; is both abstract & concrete; actual & unfolding

highly fractured stone of a collective intensity (--> Iran, and most other places)

______________


ajayeb was/is very much committed to the concrete: that means committed to speculation and curiosity (and not the demystification and uncovering truths that support a well-known picture of the world) (it was only to a certain degree in support of the middle age islamic picture)

*a something both animated and inhabitable

how to approach a weighted and reeling [walk as if unable to control one's movements] present?
(to name)

(Stewart > Berlant:) objects and scenes of desire hold promise, keeping whole clusters of affects magnetized to them
-an individual's abstract yet contingent desire to feel like he or she is “in” something or can recognize something [@Lili, Aela]

***promise is always promise to be present to the scene


i am reading in ajayeb the actual lines of potential that a something coming together calls to mind an sets in motion

exert palpable pressures

(working with ajayen equip me with recognizing the) immanent نافذ, obtuse پخ, erratic ويلان (=/= “obvious meaning” of semantic message and symbolic signification;) to pick up density and texture
(in tasavof, in iranian poetry, in ajayeb, in my peer's works, )
-asking: what potential modes of knowing, relating, and attending to things are already somehow persent in them --> potentiality & resonance


(according to Stewart) ordinary affects are more directly compelling than ideologies, as well as more fractious, multiplicitous, and unpredictable than symbolic meaning*** (in short: canon of “Thinking”) --> “bigger” structures and underlying causes obscure the ways in which a reeling present is composed out of heterogeneous and noncoherent singularities
-Sven's ordinary[...]